Sunday, January 9, 2011

$#@! my daughter says

Avery has had quite the week. On Wednesday she was playing in the room adjacent to where I was doing some homework, talking to herself and such, when I hear, amidst the mumbling, SH#@! No joke. Clear as anything, my baby girl said her first curse word. Not only did she say it, she used it 100% correctly. Holy cow, I was f-l-o-o-r-e-d. I have NO IDEA where she heard it from, either. I swear. Wait, I don't mean I SWEAR-swear, i just assure you that she didn't hear that mess at home. I got my jaw off of the floor eventually and snapped into mommy mode, telling her in the most serious way possible exactly how unacceptable mean language like that is. I have a nephew who used to bite until his parents finally (after multiple bleeding bites on his sisters) tried smacking him once on the mouth when he bit. And he decided really quickly that he was not going to bite anymore. Well, I'll admit it, just like that tactic I really wanted to associate swearing with something pretty scary, so I told Avery the next time she chose to say inappropriate words, she was going to get a smack on the mouth. She took it very seriously and told me sorry.
When Daddy got home (I, of course, had called and told him all about it earlier) he asked Avery if she had used bad language. She told him yes, but she would never do it again. Then I said, "Tell Daddy what will happen if you use foul language again."
Avery thinks about it for a minute, then, LIGHTBULB! "Oh yeah, " she says, "Mommy is going to punch me in the face."
Dead. Serious.
I am still laughing.
Then today Klayton and I popped some popcorn and turned on a movie for Avery. When K brought out the movie, he said, "Avery, do you want to watch Day-speak-ah-ble Me?"
Avery replies, "It's Despicable Me, you idiot!"
Now it was K's turn for the serious language talk. He sat her down and told her how hurtful words like idiot are. So Avery says, "But Daddy! Woody calls Buzz idiot!" Ahh Toy Story. Well, at least she didn't learn that other word from Woody.
When did my baby turn into a legit little kid? What is next?! I am afraid to find out.

5 comments:

Jane said...

HAhahahah!!!! incredible!!! this post is killing me.

Mallory Evans Photography said...

hahahah oh my GOSH. i am so floored too, where did she hear that hahah?? those nice christian nursery workers might not be so nice at all! hah jk that is so funny though, but yeah very serious. and idiot hahahah av is soo smart. its unreal. hahaha love her!!!
HAHAH oh yeah i forgot the punch in the face part hahahahahahah!!!!! hyrum says crazy stuff like that too, when he was trying to run away once in public, holly grabbed his arm to stop him and he yelled out 'youre breaking my arm!! youre breaking my neck!!!' hahahahah its like, where on earth did he learn that from hahah!

Stacy said...

Oh my Heck! I Freaking love this girl! I laugh so hard, everytime I think of this. Thanks Av, for making me laugh!!

Dapoppins said...

It's kinda weird that my kids never did have that moment where I had to talk to them about words we don't use...or maybe I missed it and their Dad had that discussion with them and never told me? The worst word in our home that they use and Daddy says they shouldn't is BUTT. Not Butt-head or Butt-face, although they might have tried to get creative, but we stopped that quick, just BUTT. And I am the one who uses it most. I love that word.

I clicked on the link for the recipees. I am all for cooking with less sugar. I'd like to keep the sugar and white flour in the treats, where it belongs, and know when I am making a healty meal it is actually healthy.

But will the kids like a fully "unrefined" meal? Now that is a question!

Tim and Katie Jean said...

Okay, I have to admit. I am laughing. Still. And some more laughing. I like it when she turns to other kids in sunbeams and says "shhhhhh. that's not reverent."